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The Stags Among the Hens

27/5/2014

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PictureImage: Mary
Now that the Kimye union is official we can all agree that Kanye West and the Kardashians have declared wedding season 2014 open. Rather than keep details of the day under wraps, risking tabloids being filled with fuzzy undercover images of the nuptials the couple appear to have encouraged friends and family to Instagram the heck out of their special day. The bride's hen do in Paris was photographed for all to see and not a single plastic penis was captured on camera. Though I get the feeling Kris is the kind of Cool Mom who would have been REALLY! AMUSED! by a plastic peen. HA! HAHA! 'Cos she's a Fun Mom. I'm not sure what went down at Kanye's stag but it appears he managed to steer clear of any questionable incidents with an flight attendant's bottom. Unlike another stag on a flight back from Spain. 

48 year old Peter Thompson was on a drunken flight (as in he and his stags were drunk, the pilot - we assume - was sober) when he was overcome with attraction for a staff member in her Ryan Air uniform, which aren't as alluring as the Easy Jet uniform but still, climbed on to his friend's lap to announce his love for her and smack her bottom. 

Thompson has been taken to court over the incident, the flight attendant's lawyer read a statement saying: "'He was looking at me as if I was a piece of meat...' As she walked past he smacked her bottom with his open right hand. She pushed his hand away and said "Don't do that again". He wasn't aggressive, she thinks he was trying to be funny but was actually very disrespectful."
The Daily Mail has posted this story to the reception of the usual comments claiming the woman is over reacting. That she should have just given him a slap. As though if you choose to do a certain job you waive your right to feel safe in your workplace. 

they smash crockery to ward off evil spirits. Which sounds a lot nicer than to portray marriage as a trap 

There is also the question of whether or not you get kind of a free pass if you're a stag or hen. Like the English abroad, people on hen or stag do's act in a manner they probably wouldn't at home. And it's not so surprising, considering that according to a press release I received last month for the One4All gift card: "The average wedding guest spends in excess of £400 on a wedding - almost a week's wage - with the wedding gift, the day itself, hotels, and hen and stag dos all mounting up to a small fortune."

The history behind the hen and stag do is pretty scant, particularly for the noble hen do. According to some slightly questionable events sites who provide no sources the stag do definitely goes back to the time of Henry VII if not way before to the 5th century BC. The groom would have a dinner with friends to celebrate his last night as a single man. 

Which is probably why there is a lot of focus on a 'last night of freedom', which is nonsense because usually the hen and stag live together anyway so the only thing that is likely to change for the pair is their bank balance. 

According to Wikipedia in Germany the bride and groom get together on the night before their wedding for a party with their friends and family where they will hold a Polterabend - in which they smash crockery to ward off evil spirits and envious spirits. Which sounds a lot nicer than to portray marriage as a trap (it's a trap!). You just have to deal with some evil spirits before you can embark on married life.

Other countries adhere to the stag traditions of getting drunk and maybe visiting a strip bar. Maybe a little dressing up. It is possible to engage in such debauchery without falling under the impression all butts are up for grabs, but there seems to be a different take in England where it seems everybody should respect your last night of freedom. 

Let's take a quick look at England's entry for a traditional stag do here, I think it shows both the traditional attitude of the stag, but also how the rest of the world regards an English Stag party: "With the rise of budget airlines, some stags in the UK go abroad, with Krakow, Dublin, and Riga topping the list, followed by Prague,  Amsterdam,  Bratislava, and Budapest. Stag parties abroad have been known to involve visits to brothels  and prostitutes, which then may encourage sex trafficking of vulnerable women."

Of course a brothel could be perfectly reputable and the sex workers perfectly safe and happy to earn a living this way. But the Wikipedia entry and the flight attendant incident suggest the last night of freedom thing is excusing a misogynistic attitude. And who wants to marry that?

Still, could have been worse. Could have been paint balling. 

Squeamish Kate
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