The Squeamish Surgery

The doctor is IN. Image: JD Hancock

As an out feminist I am often asked the same questions. I get asked about feminism and boyfriends, as far as I am aware, you’re allowed boyfriends or girlfriends – as many as you can stand and still be a feminist. I have been asked about dressing as a feminist, answer: skimpy clothing is allowed. I have been asked about my eyebrows, I’m not sure if that has anything to do with feminism – I just have really great eyebrows. I have also been asked what feminism has done for me.

Since starting up a feminist site those questions continue to be asked but checking the stats it seems people have a lot of things they are too shy to put forward for Ask a Feminist. Where do the shy take their embarrassing questions? Why, Google of course.  

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Checking the keyword search terms for SqueamishBikini.com it seems many are typing questions into Google and happening upon the site.  Looking at their queries I fear we did not provide them with any answers. Or the much hoped for, well, let's call them niche bikini images requested.

We recently received a message from one such googler searching for a forgotten song, armed only with the dim recollection of the chorus. Whilst of course our site was a joy to chance upon, it did not give the answer our intrepid googler was searching for. Happily I was able to inform them that they were thinking of The Gymslips' Drink Problem and it made me feel great.

Therefore, in an effort to be of service to those people trundling the internet asking about bikini etiquette, Bessie Smith and breast enlargement cupping devices I am here for you and I shall answer your questions. 

That depends on whether this is ‘a lady’ or a specific lady with whom you are acquainted. It is fine to inform your lady-friend you have ambitions to one day see her in a bikini. It is not fine to shout to a lady on the street you want to see her in a bikini. 

No. There are no side effects from the breast enlargement cupping appliance for a lady. Including breast enlargement. 

Yes, as I have written before, there is no occasion for which a metallic material is not suitable.    Might I suggest you invest in this H&M creation for a summery gold look that will be a little cooler than lurex. 

Well, no. But you can read about Bessie Smith here, where it is implied in the title she invented the blues.

Sometimes what you’re wondering about, as you sit at your computer, cannot be expressed as a question. Perhaps it is a fact you half remember, or an occurrence you would like confirmation of. You know it’s not a question but you hoped Google might help you out a little and I refuse to let you down.

I can’t help you. 

I agree, in fact I have discussed my adoration of Barbie before.

Fans of Sue Perkins might find this an unlikely scenario, however I believe I know to what this googler is referring to. A charming but adult anecdote Perkins shared on the Graham Norton Show. You'll note either somebody searched for this twice or two separate people were hunting this clip down.  

Are you after a bikini for your mythical creatures? Or a bikini with mythical creatures printed on it? If it is the latter than you are in luck my friend

And sometimes, I think you guys are just making a statement that you just can’t keep to yourself. 

Did she? Piers Morgan is that you? 

Squeamish Bikini  readers, I do hope this piece leaves you better informed. Remember, any questions we are here to help. 

Squeamish Kate
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