"I blame Transformers. Many of my fellow heterosexual men appear to approach potential romantic partners as if they were those complicated robotic toys with a special hidden feature. All you need to do is turn her head just enough, raise her eyebrows, utter the secret password and woop woop woop: a siren sounds, her nipples start flashing and she instantly transforms into your own personal sex machine - Bonktamus Prime."
I always felt this was where the pick up artist first got his ideas from. Not The Game, The Game was inspired by the same thing that gets me out of bed every day. TV make over shows. The idea that the opposite sex didn’t just require a wash and a genuine interest. NO. Crisp shirts, no to ties but, oddly, yes to cufflinks. Hair product, scent, consider creative facial hair. Y’know, for the ladies.
That’s funny. It means you can spot them. Before they come over and stand a mite too close to you, making sure they look into your eyes because EYE CONTACT. Also, maybe, touch your forearm a little. Maybe say your name, if they can get it right, (if you struggle with my name, incidentally, which is one syllable, nothing doing guys) a few times because it shows interest.
It’s annoying, but harmless, right?
In fact, if anything it sounds kind of like the advice teen magazines give girls for ensnaring the boys/bringing all the boys to the yard/bagging your dream boy. Dress in a fashion boys like, hair product, scent, don’t even consider creative facial hair. Look into his eyes, touch his arm then look away giggling. Teeheehee.
you can spot them. Before they come over and stand a mite too close to you, making sure they look into your eyes...
The recently disgraced Kickstarter project (removed after it had raised the funds) Above the Game: A Guide to Getting Awesome with Women was a project some Redditors hoped to have bound into a book. With observations such as "Men are notoriously bad at reading women's minds and body language. Don't think that you're any different." harking back to teen magazine speak. You boys and your rubbishness at nuance!
This unbound tome advised: "From now on you must ASSUME that she is attracted to you and wants to be ravished...Don't ask for permission. Be dominant. Force her to rebuff your advances."
That doesn’t sound much fun for either party to be honest and it's this advice that seemed to promote or bring to mind rape that finally got Kickstarter to remove the page from its site. The page owner commented: “I am devastated and troubled by the allegations that my book, Above The Game: A Guide to Getting Awesome with Women, promotes rape. That couldn't be further from the truth...People took advice from a section on "Physical Escalation & Sex" and posted them online. Devoid of context, they appeared to be promoting sexually assaulting women when that wasn't the case at all.”
Apparently: "The gist of the controversial advice is 'Don't wait for signs before you make your move. Let her be the one who rejects your advances. If she says no, stop immediately and tell her you don't want to do anything that would make her uncomfortable. Try again at a later time if appropriate or cease entirely if she is absolutely not interested.'"
I can understand a world where you might like to think telling the readers of a sex and dating manual that no means no is not required. However we need to think about why we think we need such manuals at all rather than promoting discussion, consent and mutual pleasure in sex education and magazines.
Because it is clear all sexes would like it if we came with instruction manuals.