Strike a pose in Red

Lady in red Jessica Rabbit Image: Sylvar

You know, a little while back BBC show Woman's Hour, (32.20 minutes in) which is sadly not airing today, had a feature on wearing red. We weren't aware but apparently it's a notoriously tough colour to wear. According to the British Heart Foundation (which you can donate to here) a third of women "secretly wish they had the confidence to wear red." They worry it draws too much attention to them.

This, dear reader, is silly. Red is a wonderful colour that doesn't even say 'look at me' - here's lesson 1 about wearing colours, colours say nothing. Only the wearer gets to make utterances or statements, if people let their clothes speak for them nothing would get done. Or said.

Anyway, as it's midweek and Wednesday is always a wash out, we thought a How-to was in order. If you are still standing in front of your wardrobe (and probably incredibly late for work) wondering what to wear we are here to help zhoosh up your outfit with red...

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A woman in the hard hitting Woman's Hour report on wearing red said: "I feel brave when I put colour on." Having just told you colour can't speak, it can make you feel differently about yourself (that's lesson 2). Yellow might brighten your day, paired with black it might warn people to beware your sting. If people stand still and wait for you to go away then you know your colour scheme of black and yellow is working.

The colour red has a racy history, anthropologist Emma Tarlo said people: "link it with sex, violence and flamboyance." In China red symbolises good fortune and joy, who doesn't want to give the impression of joy?

'But Squeamish Kate, Squeamish Louise! My complexion can't handle red!' We hear you whine, reader, this is exactly why we are writing this and we are getting to this. Gee. Squeamish Louise worried her rosy complexion paired with red might make her look like she had constantly just run for a bus. Squeamish Kate believes a pale complexion - as with a dark complexion - is made for true reds. 

Pair red with greys, taupe or browns. Although not blue, you will look like a British Airways employee. 

A former owner of an entirely black wardrobe Squeamish Louise is now in recovery and has started to add splashes of colour. Turns out vivid red looks great next to black and everyone can wear black. In fact that's what neutrals are good for, setting off a bright colour such as red. Feeling nervous? Pair red with greys, taupe or browns. Although not blue, you will look like a British Airways employee. Unless that's what you're going for. Remember, just as there are many different complexions out there darlings, there are many hues of red. Muted, bright, pinky, dark. There's a red out there for you.

Not convinced? Consider red accessories so the colour isn't next to your face. Red tights, red shoes, red jewellery. Red nails add a certain slickness to an outfit. Or you can wear red lipstick, suffragette style, which we have a guide tohere. Squeamish Louise has trouble wearing it because of the slight mental exercise in remembering to check it hasn't rubbed off and left her looking like she's been eating strawberry jam toddler-style. We suggest a hand mirror and picking the long lasting reds Squeamish Kate recommends in said guide.

Still searching for a reason to wear red? A French study published last year in the Journal of Hospitality and Tourism Research found that waitresses who wore red earned higher tips, between 15-26% more than their fellow staff in more muted tones. Suggesting the Chinese have it right and red truly is the colour of good fortune...Therefore we urge you to pep up your Wednesday and wear red today! 

Squeamish Louise and Squeamish Kate