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Sex Education ScandalĀ 

24/10/2012

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OK, look, I don't know if I should put, like, a trigger warning here? The Daily Mail has broken some rather shocking news. You pay tax right? Do you know what your hard earned tax money is going on? It's filthy. Filthy. Perhaps you thought it went on the government, defence and running the country. Well it does, but some of your squeezed middle, honest-curtains-open-family money is going on a partly EU (eee-uuuu) funded “sordid NHS website” called Respect Yourself.

The sordid website is a sex education site that features a swift exit button for those who have DM trolled parents who are under the impression that thinking about sex is tantamount to having 'Village Bike' tattooed on a bosom budding beneath a padded BHS training bra. And what's that going to do for house prices madam, hm?

RespectYourself.info provides exceptionally comprehensive information about sex, STDs and translates that specialised language of 'heard in the playground' sex education for the modern teen who isn't as savvy as we might assume. For anyone who burns with the memory of laughing along, pretending to understand certain sex slang, not knowing whether admitting to being into eproctolagnia (do click) is the done thing or not the Respect Yourself sextionary would have been much appreciated. Instead of having to drop the word into a sentence in the hope of using it correctly: 'have you seen my eproctolagnia? I swear it was right here.'

39 secondary schools in Coventry and Warwickshire (where I used to live and let me tell you, unless you can drive there is not much to do there besides each other) are providing the NHS Respect Yourself service and it is also available as a smartphone app. There are drop down menus with headings such as Relationships, Sex, Bodies, Contraception and STIs. A few of the drop down menus feature a Talking to your Parents option. For those who cannot contemplate that as an option (besides general teenage embarrassment, vows of silence etc there are a huge amount of reasons this might not be feasible) the site provides sensible answers and has an FAQ page.

Ah the FAQ page. It's a little weird but the ideas behind Respect Yourself appears to be mixing proper information with myth busting and some of those myths are a little weird. Questions featured that I suspect are not frequently asked query tomato sauce semen and horse sex induced death. Questions I fear may have been sincerely asked concern the penetration of the ear with something other than a cotton bud. But this is the trick other sex education services have missed! The entire subject is kind of ridiculous and funny – encouraging laughter does not mean the subject is to be taken lightly but it's a good sign if you can laugh with your partner/s about sex. Apart from the odd use of 2 instead of 'to' it also avoids any uncomfortable attempts at teenspeak. A device I vividly recall consistently losing any regard I might have had for 'da info 4 me'. 

However it still has some people up in arms. Tory MP Philip Davies thinks the site: “is completely unacceptable and inappropriate. The Secretary of State [for health] should insist it is taken down straight away.” The DM was horrified that the site informs visitors “there is very little stopping you accessing hardcore pornography from the comfort of your sofa”. The notion kids today don't know that? Ha! Ha ha ha! It is! To Laugh! Anybody who has innocently googled a symptom, a misremembered lyric, the Latin name of a bird has stumbled upon online hardcore pornography. Respect Yourself knows it, I know it, you know it, the DM knows it. What I want teenagers to know is that the brightly lit, shiny people agreeing with each other loudly are not necessarily the common denominator boat floaters of the nation.

Kids these days need a definitive resource to ignore, and this is a good one.

Squeamish Kate

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