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Mean Girls Vs Science

7/10/2014

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Girls, girls, girls. Why can't you just get on? All this bitchery and slagging off and cattiness? Where oh where do you get it from? It must be instinctive. Maybe cave women scratched each others eyes out and yanked out rival women's knotty hair. By the way did you hear about this Essex girl who said she was too pretty for online dating? Here's an incredibly unflattering photo of her that she probably did not use on her dating profile. No comment riiiiiiiight?! Who knew the Daily Mail needed a new Samantha Brick? And while we are discussing women who have the audacity to announce they reckon they are a bit alright have you seen that Karen Danczuk? The wife of a Labour MP who takes rather bosomy selfies and is also a Labour councillor but that's not for here. Shocking. I don't know who these women think they are. 

It is perhaps not much of a surprise that the teenage, tweenage and younger girl should buy into cliques, rivalry and bitching. Most women have some anecdote or other of the day (or, uh, four and a half years in my case) they were given the silent treatment or had a false rumour sent around the whole school about them. Now add in the power of social networking and mobile phones and you can imagine school just got that bit more unbearable. 

The peculiar competitiveness that we see in young women and girls is only peculiar because it has yet to be channelled into any positive action. As we know from listening to Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie on Beyonce's Flawless that "We raise girls to see each other as competitors. Not for jobs or for accomplishments, which I think can be a good thing, but for the attention of men."

Note that there is no nuance on what kind of attention from men there, just attention. Just to be noticed. Perhaps that's why so many Freshers week parties, student social groups and 18-30 holidays feature themes that cast women as slags, sluts and rather old fashionedly recently in the LSE men's Rugby leaflets 'trollops'. Are they looking at you? No. Have you considered becoming more trollop-like?
In order to battle the classic girl on girl bitchiness researchers at the University of Missouri have found that a form of group therapy can help reduce what they call "relational aggression" and I call effing sneaky bullying. 

Perhaps these young women will be the ones who shut down those who chastise women for choosing how they present themselves

Researchers at the university tested the effects of a school-based, multisystemic intervention used to reduce relational aggression among girls. They call it, rather conveniently, Growing Interpersonal Relationships through Learning and Systemic Supports (GIRLSS).

The programme is a 10 week course of group counselling with caregiver training and phone consultation intervention for 'relationally aggressive' middle school aged girls. Thirty young girls aged between 12 and 15 and their parents were randomly assigned to either intervention group or a wait list control group. The girls underwent group counselling, role-playing, journalling and weekly goal setting. 

Their caregivers also underwent workshops and phone consultations in order to help them learn better monitoring and supervision skills. According to Melissa Maras, co-author of the study and assistant professor in the Department of Educational, School and Counseling Psychology at the university, this is necessary so that parents and teachers don't "unknowingly contribute to the negative behaviors."


Every time we refer to a woman who has hit the headlines only in terms of her marital status, or criticise a woman for expressing an opinion or being unashamedly ambitious we contribute to the negative behaviours. 

Perhaps these young women will be the ones who shut down those who chastise women for choosing how they present themselves and praise each other for achievements - moving upwards and onwards as a strong supportive group rather than climbing all over each other in order to get ahead, or get a man. 

Squeamish Kate
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