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Lone Lady Gaga

1/12/2011

2 Comments

 
Picture
a reference to Tai in Clueless's make over montage
I have said before I can’t tell one Gaga song from another. Apart from that one that I can’t tell apart from Madonna’s Express Yourself. This either means I’m really cool or really old. I also suspect Grace Jones and Prince are owed some royalties when it comes to Gaga.

I will, however, at a push admit that it is great to see a proper pop star again. One who realises the value of mystery and (when it comes to pop, ok) a certain zaniness in dress and behaviour. We will never know the real Gaga and that is probably a good thing for her sanity. When Gaga does open up it’s usually something positive, whether the subject is homosexuality, anti-bullying or women.

In Gaga’s Vanity Fair interview quotes her discussing why past relationships have ended. “I have never felt truly cherished by a lover. I have an inability to know what happiness feels like with a man.”

Celebrity histrionics? Perhaps. But we all hope to end up in a relationship that is “unicorns and rainbows” why should Gaga be different from the rest of us? Aside from the desperate attempts to be different from the rest of us?

As a female celebrity even Gaga cannot escape the tabloids need to paint her as unhappy single woman. But instead of remaining silent on the subject Gaga is saying she is too darn talented and men get envious of this. “I think what it really is, is that I date creative people. And I think that’s what intimidates them is not my purse, it’s my mind.”

I think she has a point. We are in flux at the moment, economically and socially. Now girls and women (allegedly) have the same opportunities and rights over their education and career, increasingly it can be women who are supporting either themselves or a household.

Sometimes we forget how far we have come, were women’s liberation (in the western world, I would like to stress) put onto a graph then somewhere towards the end of the last century there would be a sudden upward trend. Hurrah! But it seems right now it’s flat lining. Boo. We’re tapping on that glass ceiling and no one is opening the utility chic skylight to let us through.

Instead it is nigh on impossible to open a newspaper without there being an image of Bridget Jones next to an article about single women and marriage. A while ago I wrote about how women can’t afford to remain single, hence the reappearance of a post-30 sell by date.

Let’s put economic situation aside for this, it’s well established men tend to feel pressure to be the breadwinner. In addition to this however, men expect to be the intellectually superior.

Far worse than being supported by your girlfriend or wife, is being outsmarted by her. A bit of healthy competition is one thing, maybe some banter, but for a woman to be funnier or cleverer? Unacceptable. Meaning intelligent women continue to feign ignorance in front of men. Which can only lead to a dull and unchallenging relationship, surely?

So why aren’t we beyond this yet? Why demand equality in the workplace if we aren’t going to demand it in our relationships? Ladies, if a man says something wrong on a date, correct him! If he says something that isn’t funny, don’t laugh! You’ll be single for long periods of time but at least you won’t be bored!

Lady Gaga, who is extremely conscious of her celebrity, explains her attitude towards ending relationship overwhelmed by envy and spite, “What would my fans think if they knew this was happening? How would they feel about my work and about me as a female if they knew I was allowing this to go on?”

Women, just because it is men who seem to have been blessed with the mantra ‘Don’t try to change me, baby’ doesn’t mean you can’t use it too. It is possible to be just too damn good for someone, let’s overcome this hideous Bridget Jones stereotype in which we’re waiting around for some man who says we’re ok. We are waiting for someone who is interesting and challenging. Which means we’re probably in for a bloody long wait, but it will be worth it.  

 “…it’s a hideous place to be in when someone that you love has convinced you that you will never be good enough for anyone.”

Lady Gaga, I think I might have to admit a grudging affection for you. 

Squeamish Kate
2 Comments
Gareth
30/11/2011 09:28:25 pm

I love that my wife is smarter than me - it gives me a real sense of accomplishment when I beat her at Scrabble. Or in an argument.

Reply
Squeamish Kate
30/11/2011 10:07:56 pm

Exactly! Also there's such a thing as different strengths etc etc. But nothing is more soul destroying (ok maybe there is) than sitting across from your beloved and them telling you a ridiculous theory they clearly haven't updated since they thought it up at 15. And then you have to smashy smash their pet theory.

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