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Getting Our Consent in a Twist

4/12/2012

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Hi! Look, I know that since yesterday afternoon's news there really isn't much else you will want to read about. So I am going to compromise. I will try as hard as I can to frequently relate this to the Royal Womb. I just heard on Radio 4 that Kate Middleton is likely to be receiving fluids at hospital. I expect Kate is also wearing underwear. Which is funny, because I was wanted to talk to you about Victoria's Secret underwear!

Kind of scratchy looking underwear line Victoria's Secret's name has been used in a fake PR campaign called Pink loves Consent. A press release was e-mailed out about Victoria Secret's new Pink campaign, with a link to the site that says: “PINK loves CONSENT is more than a style. It's a revolution. PINK loves CONSENT is our newest collection of flirty, sexy and powerful statements that remind PINK panty-wearers and their partners to practice CONSENT.”

I confess, I was not aware of any Victoria's Secret Pink line. Having checked the authentic site it appears Pink is not Victoria's Secret's activist undies line, but a line for younger ladies. Who like pink. As, I imagine, Kate Middleton and perhaps even the gestating Royal Heir does. In fact, if the pants/panties on the genuine Victoria's Secret line were to make any kind of statement it would be a giggle and not “No means No.”

The usual Pink site is currently more preoccupied with yoga and does not have an informative Know the Facts box, as featured on the PINK loves CONSENT site: “By the time women in the United States graduate from college, one in four will have been raped. Every 21 hours someone is raped on a college campus. Women are twice as likely to be raped in their lifetime than to develop breast cancer.” 
You can immediately tell this is not a genuine Victoria's Secret campaign due to the fact that, while the model is beautiful her inner thighs are acquainted and she is a woman of colour. Not (as yet) traditional Victoria's Secret model fodder. Or British royal consort fodder. There is also the point Victoria's Secret rarely invites you to join a revolution. The prank as a whole, while good, is not what is interesting about this idea to promote consent. 

does that mean if you don't give consent you aren't sexy? 

The prank's language is interesting because the conversation regarding consent is difficult to broach. How do we instil in everyone that consent is the most important part of a sexual relationship when the UK has only recognised rape in marriage for the last 21 years? Could a line of pants that have the slogans “No means No” or “Ask First” on them help? Perhaps.

The observant amongst you might have noticed stickers going up around town centres that tell you 'Consent is sexy.' Consent! It's teh sexeh! Great, and so it is too. Isn't it? Asking for consent before you start anything is good, may be sexy, right? Wait... or does that mean if you don't give consent you aren't sexy?

If we are to open this discussion about consent and what it is then it's necessary to be as frank on the subject as we are asking others to be in their relationships. It's a bizarrely new aspect of sex education and an odd subject to be uncomfortable with discussing. Should we make it cutesy and pinkify it as a women's responsibility to make sure her partner asks? Perhaps the next step will be cans of lager that inform us on the label 'Real Men Ask'. But why not just 'you deserve consensual sex'? It's worrying that the campaign for consent could go the way of those well meaning but insulting Real Women Have Curves slogans. We are Real People, let's Really Discuss consent.   

Squeamish Kate
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