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Friday 5...Things You Don't See Any More

12/9/2013

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Perhaps it will hit you while watching an old film from your teens. Or on the bus to work. Or listening to an old song. Maybe searching for an old song you know you had on tape and if you could just hear it you could remember the name of the singer and song and download it on iTunes dammit! Mayhap a young person will stop you on the street and ask what that piss box is on the street. As you explain the days of landlines and public 'teleophone boxes' you realise - huh, you don't see those any more... We have taken a trip down memory lane and come up with things you just don't see any more...

1. Rather like the white dog poop of my childhood (that I happened upon, trod in, though never produced I hasten to add) some things have disappeared from my life and I have not given it a second thought. A few years ago I was sitting in a church sermon where a guest speaker was getting increasingly het up about gender. "There are men who dress as women! And go into women's communal changing rooms saying they are women!" he raged. Before I got up to walk out I toyed with heckling (as I understand it you can 'Amen!', you can speak in tongues but you can't heckle in church and I am not down with that) the speaker and pointing out no one, male or female has stepped foot in a communal changing room since 1995. They just weren't there one day. Hopefully, one day, neither will his trans*phobic attitude. Squeamish Kate

2. This isn't something you don't see any more so much as a realisation I had the last time I went to the cinema. There's an entire generation of viewers for who the record needle scratch noise is just the sound they play in a trailer to indication that it is a comedy movie! Records mean nothing to them, it's just generic sound
effect they play when something goes wrong or something embarrassing happens and everyone stops and stares at the main characters. This both terrifies and annoys me. Gareth

3. My friend pointed this one out to me a while ago and many a time did I pass it on the walk back from school to the comfort of my living room sofa and Ricki Lake on the actual 'box' of a TV. It was stuck to hedges and tied around fences, no reel reason (see what to did there?!) to why there was unravelled cassette tape stuck in the neighbours front garden bushes. Squeamish Nicola

4. I was reminded of one of the great Things No Longer Seen last week, when I was walking down the street and saw one. So I guess you do see them occasionally. Anyway, I digress. When I first left home at 16, I had little money for home decor but was keen to personalise my space. So I covered the walls of my bedsit in phonebox hooker cards. Looking for a specialist in A and O levels? Or maybe Tracey, who specialises in watersports? Maybe you'd prefer any number of teenaged models from exotic locales? Whatever you wanted, it was there on my walls in crude code. In the late 1990s, phonebox hooker cards were a work of art. And then the stupid internet went and made them irrelevant. Screw you, Craigslist. Screw you SO HARD F1 Kate

5. I have cake on the brain at the moment. but as I was watching yet another demonstration of decoration techniques it occurred to me..whatever happened to fairy cakes? that's what they were called where I
grew up; I gather elsewhere they were called angel cakes. you know - small cakes, then you cut 2 chunks ('wings') out the top, fill the hole with butter cream and stick them back in at an angle. job done. It was a simpler, more innocent time before the advent of ridiculous icing and edible glitter on everything... Squeamish Louise
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