So this week we met Miley Cyrus's grown-up adult tongue. The former Disney star who captured our hearts (and had us all fooled - as I understand the format of the show to be?) as Hannah Montana knew it would take more than a pixie crop to show us she was 20 now. And so she trod that path many a Disney star has trodden in a bid to shed her Micky Mouse ears and did stuff on the VMA stage that Daisy Duck only does in private. The Mouseketeers started it, but we can't all snog Madonna on stage (stars, they're just like us!) to show we're grown-ups now. So, in sympathy with Miley et al's struggle we have come up with some ideas on how to shed your child star image...
1. I think the best way to shed your child star image is to do a series of indie films, both humorous and serious, get a six pack, say as little as possible as you act with just a simple, understated smile and then star dating Eva Mendes and then NEVER mention Disney Club. EVER. This FF was based on real events. Squeamish Nicola
2. In my day child stars didn't need to do such an elaborate song and dance act to end their careers. We just waited until they hit puberty and stopped looking so cute and their diminishing profits were enough for their label/agents to quietly drop them. And we liked it dammit! Gareth
3. I think we can all learn a lesson from Blossom, or rather Mayim Bialik who played Blossom but we all know her as Blossom whether or not we even watched the show (I did not), there's Blossom playing Amy Farrah Fowler on The Big Bang Theory and so on. The most shocking thing you can do as a young star is educate thyself. Not summer business school at Harvard or Yale by the way, hardcore learning yo. I want to see a PhD here, Mayim Bialik has multiple degrees and a PhD. If that isn't surviving the child star curse I don't know what is. Squeamish Kate
4. It's a bit of a cliché these days to do the whole drug-taking/hair-cutting/tattoo thing. I'd like to encourage current child stars to do something different. Quit acting/singing and become a survivalist. Spend your days camping in the woods, whittling tools from trees, catching small rodents to serve with berries for dinner and drinking rain water. Justin Bieber, I'm looking at you: swap the hair product for mud. G'wan, you know you want to... Squeamish Louise
5. When it comes to shedding that Disney image, you should go big or go home. In my not so humble opinion, there's only one way to do it in style: turn up at your next mouse-related promotional event dressed up as a Warner Bros cartoon character. F1Kate
2. In my day child stars didn't need to do such an elaborate song and dance act to end their careers. We just waited until they hit puberty and stopped looking so cute and their diminishing profits were enough for their label/agents to quietly drop them. And we liked it dammit! Gareth
3. I think we can all learn a lesson from Blossom, or rather Mayim Bialik who played Blossom but we all know her as Blossom whether or not we even watched the show (I did not), there's Blossom playing Amy Farrah Fowler on The Big Bang Theory and so on. The most shocking thing you can do as a young star is educate thyself. Not summer business school at Harvard or Yale by the way, hardcore learning yo. I want to see a PhD here, Mayim Bialik has multiple degrees and a PhD. If that isn't surviving the child star curse I don't know what is. Squeamish Kate
4. It's a bit of a cliché these days to do the whole drug-taking/hair-cutting/tattoo thing. I'd like to encourage current child stars to do something different. Quit acting/singing and become a survivalist. Spend your days camping in the woods, whittling tools from trees, catching small rodents to serve with berries for dinner and drinking rain water. Justin Bieber, I'm looking at you: swap the hair product for mud. G'wan, you know you want to... Squeamish Louise
5. When it comes to shedding that Disney image, you should go big or go home. In my not so humble opinion, there's only one way to do it in style: turn up at your next mouse-related promotional event dressed up as a Warner Bros cartoon character. F1Kate
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