Squeamish Bikini
  • Home
  • Squeamish Features
  • Squeamish Reviews
  • Squeamish News
  • Squeamish Contact
  • About Squeamish

Friday 5...Porn Regulations

5/12/2014

0 Comments

 
Picture
You might have noticed we mentioned the Audiovisual Media Services Regulations 2014 yesterday. You also might have noticed that Squeamish Louise is not totally down with them because (and we quote) "these regulations will mean pornography will focus even more on traditional gender roles and male fantasy." As a site with feminist leanings and enthusiasm towards consenting adults being able to safely express themselves (like Madonna told you to) we think these regulations might need a rethink. However we do understand that once you're on a regulating rampage that regulating itch must be scratched. So we have come up with some other things we'd like to see nixed in porn...

1. When Obama won against McCain back in 2009, we had party as the votes were being counted. In order to "get us in the mood" someone brought round the Sarah Palin themed porn film Who's Nailin' Palin? I had a big old laugh when the sultry look-a-like answered the door in her glasses and suit to two men. By the time I'd stopped laughing she didn't look anything like Palin - she was naked and the guys hadn't said more than three words to her before the nailin' commenced. I think a good old natter at the start of each porno would be lovely - suspense people! Squeamish Nicola

2. Women with other women sporting long (and often sharp!) nails make me cross my legs and wince. If we are so concerned about people mimicking what they see in porn then can there please be a big public health drive to make sure fingernails are trimmed and filed before they go anywhere intimate? Squeamish Louise

3. I think the producers and directors of these films should try and bring a bit more verisimilitude to the plot. If they can't bring in a little 'will they won't they?' suspense then they could at least have everyone in more plausible costumes. The neglected wife is far more likely to open the door to the plumber wearing her pyjamas and towelling dressing gown, in cartoon character slippers. He sees through all that and makes her feel truly valued. Lovely. Squeamish Kate

4. I would censor cum-faces. No one needs to see anyone else's orgasm face, unless they've had a hand (or tongue, fnar fnar) in making it happen. F1Kate

5. I'm totally in favour of banning all porn that is bad. I just feel that they've gone for the wrong definition of bad. I want the stuff that isn't worth watching outlawed so we can have a more enjoyable viewing situation all round. If you can't be bothered to look like you are enjoying yourself while working in the entertainment industry you shouldn't be in it. Also women who have screaming orgasms the second some ugly slab of meat (seriously, why are nearly all the men in porn so damned ugly?) clumsily paws at their tits - that's not at all fake sounding. They do voice dialect coaching for acting roles, there should be dedicated teachers to show what fake real orgasm sounds like, and the appropriate timing in the scene to start it. Oh and spitting - especially in each others mouths. That's just unsanitary and uncouth. Gareth
submit to reddit
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Archives

    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    October 2011
    September 2011
    August 2011

    Categories

    All
    Books
    Booze
    Cinematic
    Dress Up
    Educating Sue
    Educating Sue
    Friday 5
    Friday 5
    Geekery
    Gender Agender
    Gender Agender
    Glitter And Twisted
    Glitter And Twisted
    History Repeating
    History Repeating
    How To
    Just A Thought
    Just A Thought
    Let's Get Political
    Let's Get Political
    Music
    Nom Nom Nom
    Nostalgia
    Tellybox
    Why You Should Love

    RSS Feed


Squeamish Bikini

About
Contact us
Write for us

Newsletter

Picture
     Copyright © 2013