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Friday 5...Pills

6/12/2013

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Once again, it seems that a pill for men may be just around the corner. And by that, we don't mean that an agency has taken it upon themselves to redesign a seemingly gender-­neutral product so that it is aimed exclusively at one in a (probably) doomed to boost sales (like... hmm, pens?).

No, this is amale contraceptive pill we're talking about. It's a much more complicated process to develop than a female contraceptive pill, but researchers have made a breakthrough by identifying two proteins that can be blocked to prevent the launch of sperm cells from the testes during ejaculation.

Those members of the Squeamish team who've had bad experiences with oral contraception (weight gain and libido death to name just two) think it sounds like a great idea. But it also got us thinking about how convenient life would be if you could just swallow a pill and see effects even more impressive than the absence of children...

1. I wish someone would make those pills I keep seeing advertised online ­that promise '1­3 inches of growth in a week!' ­a reality. Targeted and rapid cellular regrowth in adults? That's amazing. Limbs could be regrown,  transplant organs could be grown at will, and that's overlooking all the mundane uses like gigantic livestock rendering famine a thing of the past! Incredible! Why would you waste technology like that on your genitals?
Gareth

2. A pill I would like to take would be a 'Quick Lunch Pill' this would be for when I am too busy at work to go out and buy something or Sainsbury's or I don't want to sit at my desk yet again eating pesto and pasta which I microwaved for a little bit under the required time. It's hard to eat and type at the same time. So this pill, which actually now I come to think of it, was invented but not perfected by Willy Wonka (I remember there scene form the 1971 film ­mmm roast beef), that's the pill for me! Squeamish Nicola

3. I've heard of pills that supposedly make your hair grow back if it's all fallen out or drastically thinned. But imagine if instead you could take a pill that instantly changed the colour. No more hair dye on pillows and towels. Want to be a redhead at work and a blonde at that evening’s party? Think purple locks would really set off your new dress? No problem. Squeamish Louise

4. You know what? I get a lot of colds. I would just like a pill the cures colds. Not relieves them. Cures them. Squeamish Kate

5. Can we just go back to the days when speed was legal, came in pill form, and got prescribed by doctors? Reduced appetite, more energy, better focus, less sleep dependent... It's exactly what I need! F1 Kate
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