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Friday 5...Character Crossovers

13/2/2015

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PictureSpider-whale
After being revealed in leaked emails the Sony hack in December which set the web tingling Marvel and Sony finally confirmed thatSpider-Man is returning to the Marvel line-up. Well sort of - much like every single 90s sitcom crossover the characters won't mention or acknowledge each other when they swing back to their respective rival franchises as Sony will still produce any solo Spider-Man films. In honour of this amazing, spectacular, sensational news Squeamish Bikini asked which characters from unconnected franchises would you like to see team up.

1. This reminds me of the mind blowing time when characters from Channel 4's Brookside and Hollyoaks crossed a bridge at the same time and they appeared in each other's episodes! I think they call that the magic of TV. I'd love this to occur with Mulder and Scully and Buffy. A nice occult themed comic book story would be there perfect setting for this trio. Squeamish Nicola

2. When you're offered a dream crossover event, the temptation is to just lump in the most awesome, coolest characters you can think of, like a 5 year old playing with his toys, or the producers of The Expendables films. But like the second series of Broadchurch, or inviting Kanye to an awards show, that isn't always the greatest idea. 

Instead of throwing together heroic heroes who will be insufferably heroic with each other, it would be far more interesting to see the results of a more incongruous pairing - one which brings together characters who are as far from being natural bedfellows as Katie Hopkins is from the human emotion of what you earth-people call 'empathy'.

With this in mind, it would be enormous fun to see how Batman would get on hanging out with Swerve from the Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye comics as his new sidekick. Forget a winsome, eager youth like Robin hero-worshipping him - what The Dark Knight needs is the mechanoid equivalent of John Candy in Brewster's Millions following him around wisecracking and trying to get him super-drunk on robo-booze! 

 It would be a compelling scene - the stoic, pathologically serious Batman tooling around Gotham while gregarious idiot, Swerve: Idol of Millionsâ„¢, He Who Never Stops - or better known by his nickname from the Autobot Academy, 'Shut The Hell Up' - shoots his own face off with his My First Blaster and makes quips about Batman’s rubber nipples. Just think of the japes-potential in this crossover.

Forget the upcoming Batman Vs. Superman - this is the team-up to beat. Which is possibly what Batman would be doing to Swerve by the end of it. Chris

3. I'd love to see Al Swearengen from Deadwood (and, you know, real life history too but I'm mainly interested in the one played by Ian McShane) have to deal with a new business rival setting up another bar and brothel in town - a big eared fuck called Quark. Gareth

4. I'm going to take a slightly different approach to this one, as the only comic I read regularly is xkcd, and I have a feeling that doesn't count. So I'll go cross-theatre instead and pair Hamlet with Hedda Gabler for a moan-off. F1 Kate

5. I really feel like Anne of Greene Gables could teach the Sweet Valley kids to loosen up. Squeamish Louise
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