Squeamish Bikini
  • Home
  • Squeamish Features
  • Squeamish Reviews
  • Squeamish News
  • Squeamish Contact
  • About Squeamish

Friday 5...Baffling Halloween Costumes

28/10/2011

3 Comments

 
Picture
In the US they’ve been Halloweening it up for a while now, here in the UK we've been biding our time for Halloween weekend. How sober of us. Personally I have a rule that costumes must be homemade. However if you want to hire a costume here are some ideas that are TOTALLY Halloween themed.  You would think the rule would be ‘You can be anything you want, just make it dead’ but it appears the rule is actually ‘you can be anything you want, just make it sexy.’

Picture
1. “Oh, hello. I’m a scary spider! WOOO! No, kidding. It’s me! Grace! In a spider costume that doesn’t even have 6 legs let alone 8! HAHA fooled you. Man you were easy to fool” 

Picture
2. The Anna Rexia costume was in the news recently when a store in NYC, Ricky’s, was forced to withdraw it from sale. However a quick google shows you are still in with a chance of making fun of people with eating disorders this Halloween. You'll have everyone in stitches I'm sure. 

Picture
3.   Miss Krueger, here’s the thing that baffles me, if you’re such a fan of the Nightmare on Elm Street films…why not either drag it up and be warm or dress up as one of the other characters? I'm pretty sure Freddy never bares his midriff.  



Picture
4.  Are ladybirds frightening? Is there a widespread ladybird phobia I don’t know about? Because come Halloween I keep seeing grown women dressed as either a bee or a ladybird, ooh biodiversity! I fear you! 



Picture
5.  WHAT have I said about verisimilitude when it comes to costumes? Oh yeah Marie Antoinette, for ease of movement and not to get her legs out, anticipated the mini skirt by 200 years. 



3 Comments
Muffy link
28/10/2011 03:25:05 am

Having finally retired the 'half dead hooker' aesthetic that I normally trudge out for Halloween, and lacking in any sort of imagination, I turned to Google for help.

Your article beautifully matches my bewilderment and disappointment at the expectations of what we're meant to look like at this time of year. I mean, yes, I still remember that time when Buffy tried to get to get Willow to dress up all slutty because it was the one occasion where it would be appropriate (that was real life, right?) but...really?

There wasn't even a hint of ghoulish make up in the image search! Sure, most of the girls in the pictures had a bit more eyeliner on, but I've been a manics fan once. It just doesn't hold the same novelty appeal.

Maybe we're lucky. Maybe, because lots of the people I know go to the sorts of nights ALL THROUGH THE YEAR where they can indulge the desire to wear fetishistic or 'alternative' garb, or just surround themselves with people who don't judge them for dressing up, we don't need to slag it up quite so much at the end of every October.

Maybe, though, maybe my outfit this year (freshly assembled from the men's section in a well known bargain clothes chain) will work. Already, my relentlessly sexy friend (who will be wearing her sacrificial virgin non-dress again this year) is telling me that my suggested outfit choice is a terrible idea. She has a point - there is a fine line between Kubrick-inspired ultraviolence and the Michelin Man - but I'd rather feel at least a bit menacing than spend the night thinking I was doing nothing more than humouring the undersexed fantasies of the voyeurs of Hallow's Eve.

Maybe, I'll eat my words and drag out the corset and the thigh highs and do half dead make up again. I will possibly look more like the whale drawing if I try, but it's there as a last resort.

Reply
Kate W link
28/10/2011 03:36:07 am

I'm a bad person. I really want the slutty Marie Antoinette outfit now I know it exists.

Reply
Squeamish Kate
28/10/2011 03:48:13 am

@Kate W I'm holding out for a slutty Madame de Pompadour...

@Muffy What are you actually going as this year? You can't go as the same thing every Halloween (although this year I AM outfit repeating...the shame) tell Relentlessly Sexy Friend that.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Archives

    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    October 2011
    September 2011
    August 2011

    Categories

    All
    Books
    Booze
    Cinematic
    Dress Up
    Educating Sue
    Educating Sue
    Friday 5
    Friday 5
    Geekery
    Gender Agender
    Gender Agender
    Glitter And Twisted
    Glitter And Twisted
    History Repeating
    History Repeating
    How To
    Just A Thought
    Just A Thought
    Let's Get Political
    Let's Get Political
    Music
    Nom Nom Nom
    Nostalgia
    Tellybox
    Why You Should Love

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
Photos used under Creative Commons from Pink Sherbet Photography, anunez619, NikRugby23!, Asso Pixiel