When Squeamish Louise and I started this website one of the, frankly stifling rules, set was ‘No Snarking’. Today I break this rule and we refine it to ‘No Body Snarking’. The other rule was ‘Don’t Write Crap’, I leave it to you to decide when or if that’s gone out the window.

Madonna’s biopic (I use the term loosely) of Wallis Simpson has been pretty comprehensively trashed. It was unlikely to be popular, all Madonna’s projects outside of pop have been panned and with Wallis Simpson as her subject for this foray why should this one be different. Hoping to emulate the anachronistic style last seen in Sophia Coppola’s Marie Antoinette, Madonna has instead created a Wallis Simpson meets Carrie Bradshaw vehicle. I have mentioned before I hate anachronisms and value accurate period details so you can probably guess what I think about Wallis Simpson leaping up and dancing to The Sex Pistol’s Pretty Vacant.

The interweb is a buzz about the three brand new episodes of Absolutely Fabulous due in time for the 20th anniversary of the show. I loved the first couple of series when I first watched it in the 90s and I don't mind telling you I still find those episodes funny now. Only instead of laughing because “haha, mobile phones?! Cosmetic surgery?! Well I never!” we now laugh because “haha, I identify!”

I should probably begin this by making a confession. I love dressing up. Not just for parties but for every single day. No matter what the occasion I always choose clothes from the floordrobe with a specific era in mind. So imagine my pernickety pain as I bore witness to freshers week partygoers heading to 80s themed parties and interpreting the decade that spawned them as a whirl of neon lycra gym gear and nothing else. No Thatcher, no Carebears no Charlene Robinson from Neighbours even. I watched these parties go by and my first thought “Why was I not invited?” was always followed, (rather answering my question) by, “Geez! Can we please bring some VERISIMILLITUDE to this 80s fancy dress mess?” I happen to know the 80s is well documented on Google. There's no excuse.