Admit it; you watched BBC 3 make-under show Snog, Marry, Avoid. I don’t blame you, it was a peculiarly compelling format. Girl gets filmed applying make-up, slapping on fake tan and wearing more pairs of false eyelashes than she has eyes. Girl then takes BBC 3 cameras out with her to da club on a mission to seduce men, ending the night with a kebab and the claim that POD (the Personal Overhaul Device – look, go with it) could never change her. Cue the Snog, Marry, Avoid test, a beanie hat and weepy admission they no longer wanted to attract footballers or ‘players’.
Snog, Marry, Avoid styled itself as the first make-under show, although it was not as modern or progressive as it claimed. The message was these (occasionally fluorescent) girls would be a lot happier were they to rid themselves of fakery and become Plain Jane and settle for an Average Joe who will marry her now. Essentially BBC 3 managed to get 4 series out of an idea based on a great aunt’s fondness for spitting on her hanky and wiping it around her “such a pretty girl, once” niece’s face.
Snog, Marry, Avoid styled itself as the first make-under show, although it was not as modern or progressive as it claimed. The message was these (occasionally fluorescent) girls would be a lot happier were they to rid themselves of fakery and become Plain Jane and settle for an Average Joe who will marry her now. Essentially BBC 3 managed to get 4 series out of an idea based on a great aunt’s fondness for spitting on her hanky and wiping it around her “such a pretty girl, once” niece’s face.
I know, it was like Beyoncé never sang Independent Woman (Part 1). Ladies it ain’t easy being independent. Question: but is it near as dammit is to swearing impossible? Apparently so, because whilst the BBC has been busy marrying off fresh-faced ladies left, right and centre Channel 4’s taken a different tack.
Tonight Channel 4 will bring you: Sex, Lies and Rinsing Guys. A documentary concerning the women many of the ‘Befores’ on Snog, Marry, Avoid aspired to be. Glamour models Holly Henderson and Nicki Howarth will be featuring in Channel 4’s documentary about women who accept gifts and money from men, known henceforth as ‘rinsers’. Metro describes rinsing as “the ‘art’ of manipulating men into splashing their cash while keeping sex off the table.”
The women on the documentary promise to let us in on their rinsing secrets. Somehow the Metro manages to interpret this as “gender equality hurtling back to the Dark Ages – only this time, the girls are on top.” I believe the formula of cleavage = free Smirnoff Ice is as old as time. Or whatever the equivalent to Smirnoff Ice was in The Olden Days, let’s say gin, which only recently edged into ‘classy’ territory.
Call them Dirty Old Men, call them Sugar Daddies, call them Rich Idiots. These girls are only “on top” for as long as these men are willing to pay. These are not the creaking sounds of the gender equality tables turning. It’s a rebranding of the mistress, the maîtresse-en-titre, the bit on the side, only with less perks. At least as a maîtresse-en-titre you were likely to go down in history as being witty and an expert conversationalist.
Whilst I am of the Beyoncé school of “I bought it” and I find this resurgence in a search for Sugar Daddy style support is deflating I respect the decision to go down that route. What I find odd now is the media’s notion that these women are representative of all women. That this must be seen as either A) a raspberry to feminism or B) a post-feminist triumph.
The utterance from one of the women participating in this documentary that “men take more from me than I take from them” rather belies the Channel 4 voiceover’s insistence that these women are: “Receiving glamorous gifts…but on their own terms.”
Let’s be very, very clear about this. These women are relying on men to pay for things. Whether or not “legs remain firmly closed” this is not “redefining relationships” Channel 4. This is a regurgitation of materialism used as a justification for actions (sorry, inactions). I don’t know if these women could throw their hands up at Beyoncé and declare themselves independent women. That’s fine, there are other Destiny’s Child tracks these ladies can be a part of. You just wouldn’t think it from the media coverage women seem to receive presently.
The women on the documentary promise to let us in on their rinsing secrets. Somehow the Metro manages to interpret this as “gender equality hurtling back to the Dark Ages – only this time, the girls are on top.” I believe the formula of cleavage = free Smirnoff Ice is as old as time. Or whatever the equivalent to Smirnoff Ice was in The Olden Days, let’s say gin, which only recently edged into ‘classy’ territory.
Call them Dirty Old Men, call them Sugar Daddies, call them Rich Idiots. These girls are only “on top” for as long as these men are willing to pay. These are not the creaking sounds of the gender equality tables turning. It’s a rebranding of the mistress, the maîtresse-en-titre, the bit on the side, only with less perks. At least as a maîtresse-en-titre you were likely to go down in history as being witty and an expert conversationalist.
Whilst I am of the Beyoncé school of “I bought it” and I find this resurgence in a search for Sugar Daddy style support is deflating I respect the decision to go down that route. What I find odd now is the media’s notion that these women are representative of all women. That this must be seen as either A) a raspberry to feminism or B) a post-feminist triumph.
The utterance from one of the women participating in this documentary that “men take more from me than I take from them” rather belies the Channel 4 voiceover’s insistence that these women are: “Receiving glamorous gifts…but on their own terms.”
Let’s be very, very clear about this. These women are relying on men to pay for things. Whether or not “legs remain firmly closed” this is not “redefining relationships” Channel 4. This is a regurgitation of materialism used as a justification for actions (sorry, inactions). I don’t know if these women could throw their hands up at Beyoncé and declare themselves independent women. That’s fine, there are other Destiny’s Child tracks these ladies can be a part of. You just wouldn’t think it from the media coverage women seem to receive presently.
Channel 4 and BBC 3 there is more to women than men, make up and money and I would like to see some of these women on TV instead of these endless attempts to package feminism-lite in a neat designer bag.
Squeamish Kate - Pitch us some new ideas you would like to see on Channel 4 or BBC 3 on Twitter @SqueamishBikini
Squeamish Kate - Pitch us some new ideas you would like to see on Channel 4 or BBC 3 on Twitter @SqueamishBikini
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