
Women's safety is a complicated topic (aren't they all?) because when pursuing it you come up against various obstacles that make it hard to achieve. For instance firstly there is the issue that feminists witness often. That women are safe. Job done. And by the way have we considered all the young men at risk? Secondly how do we guarantee women's safety whilst not unintentionally casting them in the constant damsel in distress role? Thirdly it can give the impression that every man is a dangerously sex-crazed misogynist and every woman is vulnerable - meaning everyone is on edge and rather more likely to do something nervy and unwise.
Often these discussions can somehow descend quickly into a "well I wouldn't rape you anyway - even if you were begging for it" (I see this cutting remark often and nobody ever seems to point out that begging for it would make it consensual sex and not rape) as demonstrated by Dapper Laugh's supportive and insightful father who tweeted that a woman writer who had criticised his son was "to [sic] ugly ⦠to rape".
So where does Siren come in to all this? Siren is a heterosexual (with plans to include a same sex version) dating app created by Susie Lee and Katrina Hess, based on the principle that "women needed to control visibility". | Visibility on dating sites apparently equals relinquishing any kind of discernment. |
It's interesting because under the guise of creating a safe space for women, Siren actually creates a safe space for men. There's less risk in the approach because the woman in question has already made clear her interest. Of course also because of the nature of Siren it is unlikely that men signing up to it are necessarily the type who send aggressive messages - however most hetero women will tell you 'ware the 'nice guy'.
However the reason women sometimes receive aggressive messages that ask why, if they won't meet up, did they put their profile up on a dating site. Visibility on dating sites apparently equals relinquishing any kind of discernment. Will this be solved by models such as Siren? I'm not sure that putting women behind some kind of digital curtain will solve this peculiar anger men seem to feel entitled to when they come up against rejection.
Squeamish Kate