Elsewhere, the Independent wants you to know that you might stay married longer if you 'outsource' certain parts of the marriage. Like sex.
They're not even talking about cheating – the research quoted here talks about "an openly consensual nonmonogamous relationship". Well yes, we have words and phrases to describe that along with thousands (millions?) of people actually practising various forms of non-monogamous relationships.
I'm not here to advocate for any particular lifestyle, or to tell you that if you're happily monogamous (or anything else) you're somehow doing it wrong. I AM glad to see an increasing number of articles about different ways of living in the mainstream press. People are increasingly writing and talking about nonmonogamous set ups. Too often these are still centred around the love lives of middleclass white folk (or assumed to be); and there's still a lot of focus on polyamorous relationships that are heterosexual or have a heterosexual couple at the centre of the story.
There's very little, if any, mainstream discussion of how disabilities or financial constraints might affect people who want to pursue different relationship options but are hemmed in by factors that limit their options on top of a society that assumes those options either don't exist, or shouldn't exist for you. But hey, it's a start.
Sometimes I feel like I should make flags and tshirts saying 'polyamory for successful living!'
But let's keep this conversation going. Let's talk about different ways of living. Let's talk about whether you have to shag someone to love them, and vice versa. Maybe the whole way we've set up everything to do with love - marriage - sex - expectations around relationships - maybe it's all beyond fucked up. Maybe it works for a few people and for others it is horribly constricting and unhappymaking. Perhaps we should try on some new perspectives. Maybe.